I'm in that akward stage between jailbait and cougar
She has an album entitled "my photography", which consists of about 80 different pictures of a tractor that she took on her cell phone. I'm all for freedom of expression, but come on.
So drunk can't even tell it's my own house. WOaoOw.
You know those ponds where you go and pay $5 and your guarranteed to catch a fish thats how i describe her
Just walked by a group of guys calling out walks of shame with a mega phone from their front porch.
so yeah i told her you were going to become a doctor and the first thing she said was "i still don't want to fuck him". i tried.
He is offering to pay me back by sending me a dick pic.
.......................................
My thoughts exactly.
Hey, you guys have all had chicken pox, right?
I saw a picture of my dad holding my legs in a kegstand. Town festival=success.
An hour is enough time for me to get drunk and win a dry hump marathon so I hope you have somewhat similar or better goals
It's like everything I need in life within a five block radius: booze, toilets, dogs, dicks.
Can we talk about the fact that a stranger is doing a line of coke off our living room table right now?
Just because you are home alone for the weekend doesn't mean you can act like a nudist.
I accept your opinion but respectfully disagree. Also, I'm sitting in your chair.
I just realized. I havent even gotten a paycheck from this new job yet and already laid one of the girls most of the dudes are after
Dry spell is over and now I’m drowning in a river of dick. The dam broke and now half the dicks in DC are trying get in my skirt
It’s a glorious dick miracle!
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