No it only became awkward when she walked in with her new boyfriend and we realized we'd all banged her
69 is so not fun when his penis is sporting a 70s hairstyle
His facebook says he is a fan of "underwater handjobs"
he burped in my vagina and tried to deny it...
The preggo girl brought her pet chipmunk to class today. fyi.
I wish someone would just come knock on my door and fuck me already so that me and my stuffed animals aren't the only ones who see my amazing spring break tan. I'm not getting skin cancer so I can just sit here abstinent.
oh, so if i go friday and she's there, you are going to be my sponsor for not banging the crazy chick
She had caution tape on her head and she blew me.
We woke up at 7:30am. We got a 30 rack, yelled at all the freshman shackers walkin back to their dorms, played a game of beer die, and boned all before 11:00am. I found my soulmate
Forgot to tell you--the bartender at Crowbar set his arm on fire last night. He was doing this "Cocktail" bartender trick of pouring alcohol that was on fire between glasses. Then some leaked out, onto his arm, and set his arm on fire, then his shirt. Exciting! (And he's ok).
I think someone cast a spell on the lazy stoner rich boy stereotype and it came to life and called me.
As a courtesy going forward if you could not bang in my house that would be nice
I just sold Adderall to a priest, im not quite sure how I feel about this situation
BRIAN AND ANTHONY SPOON FED MY BROTHER MACARONI AND CHEESE WHILE HE WAS FUCKING ZARA. THEY WENT TO HIGHFIVE HIM AND ZARA WAS LIKE "WOO!" AND HIGHFIVED THEM FIRST
he told me he wanted me to go see his cat. apparently i was more interested in playing with his cat then having sex.
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