remember when she hit me with her car by accident, well apparently it wasn't an accident.
Yeh xou jao i ama wa7tdud !!
Oh my god. its not even twelve thirty and you are useless.
yeah I know. she is a stupid fat trailer trash bitchwhore and I hate her
but when she came up to me in the bar I had to be all like "OMG HEYYY how are you, I haven't seen you in foreverrrrr!!"
but for the record, yeah, I hope she gets mauled by a bear and dies
similar to the time we made up the game of screaming at the top of our lungs any time a guy any of us slept with walked into the party. that went over SO well.
Yes, I fucked her, no she wasn't that loose, yes she caused more drama than a 14 year old girl
She just used a turkey baster to transfer alcohol from the glass to the bottle. Just thought you should know
my ass has officially been on the floor of every fraternity on this campus
and who said we didn't have goals?
I'm the only kid serving jury duty. And I'm the only one who may walk out of here in handcuffs for a warrant. I'm enabling these people to doubt America's youth once again.
You said "i miss him" not "i miss his dick." You're getting emotionally attatched. Shame.
She just got out of the car and said "hold on purse.. It's going to be a bumpy ride"
I'm pretty sure I swallowed a whole condom
THIS CHICK IS LIKE SOME SORT OF HOOKER HOUDINI.
I mean like if I stood up my head might pull me down like an anchor
I didn't know where you were for like 15 minutes and then I went in the bathroom splashing water on the mirror and throwing hand towels around saying that you were "redecorating"
Im so drunk and the cops showed up so i ran on all 4's through the woods because i had no shoes hoping they would mistake me for a fox
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