oh no, I think we did it in the 'front asshole'
My t9 writes chubies instead of bitches.
either way. win, win.
from all the glitter we used it actually looked like a disco stick
I'm trying to decide if I want to bring home my 'beer champion' trophy or my chem books.
You wouldn't know anything about the tooth on ice in my freezer would you?
The carpet cleaning people refuse to steam clean human feces. I'll call back later and blame it on the dog not you
Nothing like wearing your heels and smelling like henney in the afternoon
Covered in confetti and bad decisions
Thanksgiving. This year's theme: I am thankful that I still have a liver.
Grandma is giving me marriage advice again. On the plus side, she thinks I'm straight now.
You rolled around in the grass BEFORE we went in and said it was because "ladies love that eau de earth"
Pain in my heart, regret in my vagina
Is it unethical to trim my bush hair with the scissors from my office?
We're about to play the try not to vom at the president's house game...
So the dog chewed my vibrator last night. It added a nice new texture actually.
I told him I hooked up with his best friend. And then he ate me out. I'm just THAT GOOD.
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