So is chris hansen cool in person? Or is it just awkward while you wait for the cops?
you were grabbing cocks left and right
you literally grabbed sam's dick and said, "who's cock is this?!"
at what point did you see referring to the bartender as 'the white precious' a good idea??
Confidence is key. All I had to tell him is I'm drinking a bottle of wine and eating chocolate today to celebrate that I love myself. That's how you get a Valentine, my friend.
I just very easily got pretty high off of one bowl of shitty dirt weed. I'm a sad excuse for who I used to be.
he says he is going to get you very high and make you leave the country with him
possibly by boat
i thought you were just a really comfy body pillow until i sobered up. oops.
It took me three days, but I managed to nearly get arrested on my way out of LA. Made it to the airport. Crisis averted, though. The real crime is, my flight is delayed two hours.
I just had a twenty minute discussion about endangered breed dog breeding with an Extremely drunk guy
So many questions...
My liver needs me to go back to work asap.
I woke up and my pants were in the kitchen but my shoes were next to my bed. Do the math...
He also needs to focus on not being such a little bitch, but that's none of my business.
He referred to his penis as "The Purple Headed Yogurt Slinger." I'm both disgusted and turned on
Threesomes are not as fun as you'd think. I left with a black eye and I'm not sure who's to blame.
You kept crying and I couldnt help but laugh at you, I was really high though.
Randomize
