none of my boyfriends are responding right now, I thought I had enough to avoid this problem
I have a walk of shame I should be getting to. "Hey, by the way, what is your name?" is not a conversation I want to have today
We went out. i got lost. dunno where they were. they slept in the car. i slept in an outdoor shower. i dont know anything else.
It's raining. Will need ride home and blow job.
There's strippers and bear every where so ether you gave me the wrong address or this is the coolest birthday party thrown for a seven year old ever.
Is it too early to say this year has been a blur?
No cash. I had to buy four bowls of soup to meet the credit card limit. I'm not even upset. SO MUCH SOUP.
Bake him heart shaped cookies?!? Send him a picture of your tits like an ADULT!
The bald guy bought me a shot so I chugged it and then walked out to the middle of the dance floor and told an old woman that might be your moms twin to bend it over...We didn't end on a good note though. Dude she stepped on my vans.
A duck just looked me in the eye whilst I peed in a lake. I feel so dirty.
He tried to make small talk to hide the fact that he was struggling to unhook my bra... at least he tried right?
Human centipede...with the teletubbies. That's what my nightmare had in it.
I don't even want to know.
It turned from Netflix and chill to cringeworthy YouTube videos and chill. At least he's honest.
Just threw up in a baggy on the airplane. The guys next to me clapped and bought me a jack and coke.
Livin the dream
it was like 6 shots in and he was automatically my type
Randomize
