Third unemployed latin in my bed this week. I'm on a roll
I see an opportunity for you to use your nakedness to cure my boredom.
never let anyone you met on skype borrow your car. lesson learned.
STOP SENDING ME DANCING JESUS FORWARDS.
i'm at the gym and so are four guys who have seen my tits. i need winter break.
your cum blends into my yellow sheets :/
I've decided I'm just gonna keep drinking til the baby bump shows...
i remember you telling me to take a shower, brush my teeth, go get back in bed w her, and "just do what i was born to do." and as soon as i stopped yacking i did just that. you saved my birthday.
I just had some guy offer to eat me out on my lunch break... I think single life is getting better everyday
Want to get together for a boner voyage before you leave?
Haha pretty bummed I didn't stay night yesterday after the bj fest you described
Went to bed with a bowl of spaghetti O's on my chest, I make my own breakfast in bed. New level of laziness
I really don't think there's anything more liberating than farting.in a loud bar where no one.can.hear you
Oh, and one of the worst parts... his name was Mario. I fucked a Nintendo character.
You know that text I sent you last night at 2? That was 5 minutes before I ran face first into a wall of not okay
Randomize
