Yeah, getting the HI-fiVe would really put a damper on my whoring around.
So I just opened the bag you gave me and those panties aren't mine...
oh
her vagina looked like a handful of raisins.
I think god was stupid personally. The clit should be inside the vagina. Idiot.
so explain to me why i woke up in jail this morning
because you opened a jar or pickles and a bag of fritos and layed down in the middle of aisle 7 while singing 'la cucaracha'
no more ever clear
She just asked me if her C-section scar turned me on.
Um I think everyone drunk and there's some douche on violin.
She took a crow from her moms Halloween decorations, taped it to her shoulder, went to the bar and made the guys buy a drinks for both her and the crow.
I packed spaghetti and rum. But panties? Nah
It's stupid hot. I just want to be laying in a bathtub full of margaritas
At least you got a round of applause for dancing like vanilla ice across the street and into the bar. Even as you were getting carded
The Olympian is in my bed
Long story short I shit on a sidewalk while walking with multiple people. Then sprinted around the streets of Tallahassee in only gym shorts as I tore my toga off and wore it as a cape.
She was sitting on the couch in his tux jacket...no pants, eating cold vegetable lasagna. Yet I'm the weirdo?
The blonde cop looked at my license and told me I better have be home when her shift ends
I hate you
Randomize
