I'm so bored and have no one to sexy text
I think i sorta joined a cult last night
tonights recap: old cokehead freind proposed in the middle of a country bar to his trash girlfriend, saw ex-fuck who now has star shaved into his head and another with his gf, and ex-bfs best friends crackin jokes about who would fuck me first. NEVER COMING HOME AGAIN
just landed in detroit. Currently holding a bag of my own vomit. neighbor told me it was the most graceful vom she has ever seen. Kicking off bar exam week in style.
while we were having sex she stopped and said, "god is always watching". Then she started again with no other words said. We were fucked up.
Jessi just used the excuse "it's not you it's me" to get out of getting a lap dance.
I think he's in need of mouth to penis resuscitation. Which I happen to be certified
We got kicked out of Walmart for playing cod with squirt guns of course it was better then prom.
It's been over a year since we've been get-so-drunk-you-throw-beer-cans-at-fat-girls-drunk together. That needs to change.
You sucked a guys dick who's name was Chad and that wasn't a sign that it was a bad idea?!
I got my nipples pierced. If you haven't seen my boobs in the past week, you're among the minority
Stealing, and booze. If only you added meaningless sex with random people you would have wrapped all your life passions together
I gave you keys to my house and drugs. This must mean we're in a relationship.
Did you wake up next to Karina?
So that's her name
I am a unicorn in a field of flowers, you asshole.
Randomize
