now i know why they say having sex with her is the equivalent to licking a pay phone
about to try to wax my asshole... wish me luck
you googled "nude photos of celebrities you wouldn't expect to have nude photos", puked into the beer bong, and then laughed
On a positive note, new entry in my phone as 'HOT ASS, DOWN TO FUCK'. idk if its a boy or girl tho.
Update, its a couple
This whole foot fetish thing is getting out of control. He would rather hold my feet than me after we fuck.
we found him in the shower with a bottle of jose saying "this is Mexico's fault"
I want her autograph on my taint
he's my ex-boyfriend's best friend... he tried to make out with me to prevent me from hitting his friend. then they almost fought about it.
teach me your ways.
I feel like I'm going to get the reputation of being the girl who brings her dog with her to all her random hookups.
Then my perve supervisor asked about your vagina. And I was like nunya, but its glorious
Probably TMI here but I just rubbed one out while listening to thunderstruck, almost ripped my dick off.
you fail at everything in life besides blacking out
the bartender knew what was up when i took a sip of my drink, gagged and asked her to water down my water
I work 80 hours a week to prevent myself from just laying in bed and masturbating all day. It's a hands off strategy.
Nobody wants to date "Eats Taco Bell Secretly In Her Car" Girl
Randomize
