All I know is that if italians start TIME TRAVELLING were all in a lot of trouble paizon
this girl looks like the female version of brooke hogan
She was so bad on top that i found myself watching a TV that wasn't even turned on
idea:have a jello shot stand(opposed to lemonade stand) to raise money for spring break
My complete lack of self respect has really improved my blow job technique
At the hospital. Forgot we locked Eric out of the house last night as a joke. Hypothermia's a bitch.
What's the rule on cocaine before dinner?
Its 11 o'clock somewhere
He called me while he was having sex and asked if I wanted to go get mcdonalds
I ripped the door frame off last night too. Just remembered.
today i was walking through gramercy with a dress bag from David's Bridal and a bag of McDonald's. No guy would make eye contact with me as I scarfed down my fries. I think I was mankind's walking night terror.
You guys are like the reason that ketamine is a controlled substance.
I have loved her ever since she went down on my first wife
If I could eat my chicken parm naked, it would be the closest I could ever be to God.
And on the way out from Applebee's he tried to take the basket of toothpicks claiming he was using them as a tax write off. Last time I babysit my dad on thirsty Thursday.
You told me that you couldn't come over because you felt like you were gonna die and that houses eat you when you die, and my house couldn't eat you because your house would be jealous. That's when I knew to take the bowl away from you.
Randomize