yea i came on her face and told her to bring a snorkel next time
well after we realized that his best friend and my twin sister were hooking up it was kind of an unsopken agreement that we would too
Its your turn to fuck our RA next time she threatens us with an underage.
I can count the number of hours she's been sober this weekend on one hand.
Btw before you ask, the dr said there's no way shoving his dick that far down my throat is why i got laryngitis
you know what would be perfect? if you flew in on a horse/cat holding taco bell and then you swooped me up and took me to disney world and it was magical
So much to do, haven't done anything except hook up with sailors and work on my tan.
Best compliment ever: Being told that you really understand sex by a professional. After she gave you a HANDJOB.
Our conversation concluded a weekly schedule of casual sex in between classes.
Her hookup left his underwear and shorts in the dorm last night... What he was wearing when he left, we may never know.
On another note; I'm three days away from being 1/12th of my way from not having sex for a year. I need to get laid.
Have you heard yourself have sex?
I'm not THAT loud...
My neighbors filed a noise complaint.
girls shouldnt black out with american flag bandaids on their nips
Im too stoned for my mom to be picking up hitch hikers. Help.
how do you say “i know we haven’t hung out in a month, but i gave myself an amazing orgasm to your picture the other day” without coming on too strong
Randomize
