Four minutes until I can fart!
I really hope I'm not the first person who's had to wash vomit off of cash and credit cards.
That bus ride was like a tour of all the bushes I puked behind last night
never thought i'd see a ''climb of shame'' until she came down from the attic in front of the whole party..
You'll be the guy with the raft that sells burritos on the river. You'd be legendary.
aw he's cute...not in a i wanna rip his clothes off way more of a put him in my pocket and keep him as a pet
And occasionally lick whipped cream off them abs
Exactly.
I found a sock full of anal beads in my dryer. At least she washes them.
Dude, please wake him up, there are pills all over the floor and hes the only one who knows which ones to take simultaneously.
Homeboy was juggling while taking bong rips. Of course he got laid.
I have too much respect and admiration for my dick to put it into a situation where he could possibly be killed
I think it's safe to say I'm rolling my hypothetical balls off
as he was bent over the toilet, he turned to me and said "barbarian kyle is much stronger than regular kyle" and then went right back to puking.
I guess my vagina missed him because it called and left a 5 min. message. Color me impressed
You could be a whistle.. And just ask bitches if they want to blow you all night
I'll have to start mass sending dong pics to get the recognition I deserve
Randomize