I didn't join FB to see my only child straddle that boy in all her pictures.
i wonder what thom yorke's orgasms sound like
i found your underwear in my bra... i dont even remember how this happened.
shit. all i remember is the look on your moms face.
bro i finally banged her last night on our basement couch
I'm at this frat party right now and yelled "my little 16 year old brother finally lost his virginity." They gave you a standing ovation
organizing the empties. That sober.
He made me a period mix..should I back out now?
then he compared my vagina to a dishwasher. A DISHWASHER?!
It finally happened. My conscience stopped working. I've never felt so free
Just found out he cheated on me last night. But its Shark Week so I will deal with it next week.
The nursing school interview showed me a picture of my passed out during your party. They asked if this was a frquent thing. I told them you drugged me.
Kings cup with teenagers tonight
Done deal
I'm so excited for post-beer fest chipotle. It will be better than scared shitless pre-go karting chipotle.
I touched the butt once. 'Twas an experience with the greatness of legend. So I touched it once more.
I'm not snubbing your weed I just had a really important rack of ribs to get home to
I know it's super late on a work night, but can you drop by and bend me over my new motorcycle? I have tequila and tacos...
Randomize