you know you are hungover when... you set your alarm for the next time you think you are going to throw up
Four minutes until I can fart!
best thing about halloween? there are pumpkins to puke in EVERYWHERE!
she's got that wholesome 16 and pregnant look.
Skanksgiving break is awesome already... pilgrim and indian roleplay tonight.
You two were too busy to notice that his used condom landed on me when he threw it.. Thanks.
this is probably the only time in my life that i would want to fuck thomas jefferson
Watched him slip somethin into her drink. Dragged him of his bar stool, punched him out, and told her what i saw. Bartender used some chemical to confirm presence of rophynol. Just woke up at her place
hey, being drunk and dumb is my thing. Don't take that away from me.
Never let him bartend when he's tripping. He sprinkled a ton of mexican shredded cheese over a jack and coke and called in a Monterey Jack Daniels.
Do you think it's wrong for me to hop on that dick before he realizes that he's gay?
At least life still wants to fuck me.
IT TOOK ME LIKE AN HOUR TO DO THAT. DO YOU KNOW HOW HARD IT IS FOR ME TO CONCENTRATE ON ONE THING FOR AN ENTIRE HOUR?!
Your liver needs more exercise - we start training tonight.
I just discovered that jello shots are the best hangover cure
You said that last night when you did jello shots at 4am
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