I'm too stoned for this. I'm Canadian.
thank god dogs can't talk. they see way to much.
I just woke up at my desk with "To Whommmmmmmmm" typed on a letter. I have no memory of waking up, getting dressed or driving in.
i hope not, i just know that at one point I was sitting on the bathroom floor eating bugles and crying because i had no one to show that it looked like I had witch nails when i stuck them on the ends of all ofmy fingers.
I'm having a self conscious moment and I need your complete honest opinion of my boobs.
I apologize for being mean. I love the blender and your vagina.
I just can't even fathom the crazy and I work at a mental hospital.
i think i just asked a donut if it was ok
So I just bought e from my sophomore home ec teacher. How's your weekend going?
I can't believe this. 100 bucks says my Botox lasts longer than their marriage will.
Did you leave ur panties in the sink?
Kitchen or bathroom?
I'M TOO HORNY FOR GRAMMAR!!!
Wow you are like a taller more attractive sex Yoda.
The shower rod just came down while I was pooping. I caught it though and the curtain stayed on, so I'm not sure if it's a good or bad omen for the rest of my day
And then he peed in my hair
Randomize
