Lets evaluate? U kissed one boss and lef twith another man. I cock teased the other, hardcore had a tongue jammed down my throat, made out w aa third then left in a cab w alex w them all yelling at me and offering rides. My cheek was also licked and bitten by 2 other men and we almost made out (u and me) because they asked. were hired.
So I'm going back to my apartment just to get my vibrator.
I thought you were moving in with your boyfriend for the summer?
Well....one will keep me from having to pay rent and the other satisfies. I'll let you figure it out.
people from other dorms came to marvel at the dump i took. i had a bio major take a picture.
i just threw up a quarter into the urinal in the bathroom at the bar. everybody else stared then cheered. that drunk
what part of “beer fountain” do you not understand
I keep having to talk dad out of putting tequila in the milkshakes.
Idea for the cake. Joints for candles. Do it.
I woke up naked in his kitchen...His name is Mike and we're having a "what happened last night" beer.
Things are burning & the world smells of peanut butter. It's beautiful.
At a bar across from the city police station. I PROMISE I will do something great.
I'm pretty sure I just came a kidney stone..
I felt like I crashed a wedding. Everyone was dressed so nice and I was covered in actual dirt and a little blood.
Made out with sailor moon tonight. Childhood dreams do come true.
I have had my dick inside of entirely too many people at this wedding in order for me to be the groom. Please give me a swift kick in the dick to wake me up from this nightmare
Well, not only did I find out the Top Knight has roof access, I also let a guy I just met eat me out on the roof. Seems like a lot of wins if you ask me.
Randomize
