so ur a construction worker, male escort, sex god and surfer? lol
well its been awhile since I've surfed
i nerd-gasmd. plain and simple.
she requested me as her brother on facebook.... biggest. letdown. ever.
Lowest moment of my life just occurred. I literally threw up all over myself in front of my parents.
You never did explain why you were in wal-mart with a wok full of popcorn.
TO ALL WHO WERE IN MY HOUSE LAST NIGHT: WHOEVER STOLE MY BONG AND PUT IT ON THE ROOF WILL BE PAYING MY HOSPITAL BILL FROM LAST NIGHT.. AND BUYING ME A NEW, SWEETER BONG.
We drove around last night shotting fireworks out the window while they had sex in the back of his car
Nothing says never again like hurling in the shower.
Just once, I'd like to hook up with a girl that doesn't look like she's having a near-fatal seizure when I give her an orgasm.
We need to figure out what we are doing for halloween asap. I'm not going out like a punk ass bitch burger king again this year.
Some poor guy found you passed out in a bathroom stall. Again with your dick out. Looks like you got to rage after all.
Welcome to the difference between being FWBs (remember how we used to see who could get more lap dances a night?) and being in a relationship. Fun, huh?
Summary of my night: made out with a complete stranger at a club dressed in the Geico gecko costume...
THAT'S NOT NICE
NEITHER WAS PROMISING NOT TO TAKE MY SISTER'S VIRGINITY, THEN PROMPTLY DOING SO
My disapointment is making my balls hurt :(
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