Is there some kind of disinfectant spray people use? Why would anyone want to eat ass??
Ok just saw a girl open a pillbox, dump it out on her notebook and count out 13 adderall tabs and put them in a baggie and leave. Oh hey college.
you are my new fav person for making him do the walk of shame in pink footie pajamas!
Umm. Any where really. Alcohol and boobs. Those are the requirements.
You know why I moved here? No public intoxication law. A cop just helped me from my bent over vomit pose, asked if I was ok, and gave me a ride home.
Man, jail baloney is awful.
Do you remember snorting allspice and yelling at doughnut shop girl?
You were fucked up like a footballbat trying to eat gum off your shoe. And that wasn't even the nights lowest point.
I wouldn't blame my organs if they just decided to quit working after this weekend
The maintenance guy says happy birthday. Also, he likes your penis balloon.
I got a 5/5 with my "I don't want a baby" rant essay. She said my use of the word "leeches" was a powerful metaphor :)
she keeps dunkaroos and gatorade in her bed. yep pretty sure im in love.
well I didn't shave for the hot dilf I banged last week so I'm sure as hell not shaving for you. Sry
Ps. I'm slapping the bag. It's an emergency.
He tried to brush a hair off my cheek, but turns out it was just a freakishly long chin hair. So no, we didn't bang.
Randomize
