Car fucking is for special occasions like birthdays and bank holidays. Don't want to lose the magic by making it an everyday thing.
sometimes i really wish you were a nugget.
you were convinced campus grass and foliage would give you your daily serving of vegetables to balance out the amount of alcohol you drank.
Dude, I think my check liver light just came on
Well, you're either very drunk or very high but I'll let it slide because I love any type of conversation concerning cheese.
Get everyone out of their dorms and watch 3 girls do the walk of shame from my room.
Do 'mystery' cracked ribs heal any quicker than regular ones?
dude, you were feeling up her boob for 20 minutes in front of the guy she was hitting on because you and her had an argument over who had bigger boobs.
hey man, it was for science okay.
My neck kind of hurts. I think from sleeping on the concrete.
You ran down the alley towards a stranger screaming "you took my beer".... Then proceeded to run into a garage, fall down, and scream about how your shirt makes you look fat.
So what other shows do you masturbate to? Or is it just friends
I have hobbies that aren't destroying myself and others...i can make hats.....
She pinched my nipples too hard I THINK THEYRE GONE
I TOLD YOU ABOUT GOTH CHICKS BRO. I WARNED YOU
He's gonna turn my vagina into the Sahara desert
he's annoying when i'm sober but vaguely hot when i'm drunk so yes i do have a preference and it goes by the name of vodka
Randomize
