I googled "I hate my uterus" just to make sure I wasn't the only one.
Also I got A jello shot for $2!!! It's like the forever 21 of bars
apparently my insurance doesn't cover road head. Bummer.
We've been broken up for 7 months. His mom sent me a card with a brochure inside titled "How at Risk for STD's are you?"
i seriously wanted to pee on her right then.
I don't know if I have the sustained energy level for partying hard
Not a choice. You are mistaking my comments as options. My statements are facts. This is what is happening.
I'm using the bullet from my cock ring to massage out my tmj lock jaw from giving too much head.
I can't keep up with all the guys you're banging. I'm just going to start referring to them by city of origin.
You know you're in the hamptons when it's 10pm And you kind of want to vomit white wine on rug that costs more than your apartment.
So what happened? Or does sex + ramen pretty much cover it?
Her parents are celebrating she found someone so well endowed.
Will there be champagne when they see the pay check?
He's gonna do me a solid for doing her a solid. It's like pay it foward. But with sex.
I hate who I am becoming
I think of it as growth but I also hate who I am becoming as well
just stepped out my front door and let the wind dry my naked body because I was too lazy to go search for a clean towel that may not even exist. I could live like this forever
This sucks! All of the twenty something dick I was getting went home when the university closed
Randomize
