like the penis drawn on my face is so detailed and well done, i'm not even upset about it.
he kept yelling THIS ISNT AMATEUR HOUR
In fairness it was pretty good sex, but I still wasn't expecting the mass cheering and applause he got on leaving my tent
BTW. If I show up really drunk and dressed a cowboy, don't be alarmed
You rang?
Saw a ginger and the first thing I thought of doing was yelling "you have no soul!" so I called you so we can yell it together with you on speakerphone.
well he got me up crazy early but i got pizza for breakfast and an electric blanket to sleep with sooo he passed the one night stand test.
Hey, met you at the bar last night. You probably dont remember my name. You and your friends came back to my place, you shattered my window with your fist then dipped. Your gonna need to pay for that.
Thats where this cut came from! Thanks for piecing together the puzzle dude.
So what are you going to be for halloween?
A woman sitting on her couch watching Hocus Pocus.
Realistically you can't tell me you're gonna put mashed potatoes on your dick and expect me not to get excited
I feel like every young boy's first wet dream is too have sex with the Pink Ranger. I am now fulfilling that dream for one man. I am a hero.
I'm pretty sure he's playing the harmonica in my shower right now. I just really need to pee.
Can we do lunch at 3? I have a blowjob scheduled for 2.
You schedule blowjobs?
"WHAT IS THIS LESBIAN MADNESS"
By the time we got to McDonald's you were sharing a Big Mac with a stripper.
I just deff did the walk of shame.. His roommate/manager woke us up. A dog scared me on my stumble to the car.
This is why I'm single.
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