They want to listen to Lady Gaga while they puke.
You know those ponds where you go and pay $5 and your guarranteed to catch a fish thats how i describe her
throwing condoms aimed at his crotch probably isn't the politest way to ask for sex
I was just on craigslist and saw and ad for a naked yoga instructor. I will no longer be jobless.
Do you remember using the heel of your shoe as a shish kabob stick? You offered me some chicken, but I declined.
I think we should roll her a welcome back, sorry your godmom's on life support blunt.
this st patricks day sucks
ill send jameson via bank tube 150+ miles
I seriously have her in my phone as "Legit 8"...even I'm surprised
Did we smoke in a portapotty last night? And if so, do you think the brown stuff covering my body is actually dirt?
it was like teleporting. everytime i opened my eyes, i was somewhere different... usually the floor.
I woke up this morning with 3 phone numbers, a red Chinese New Year envelope with cash in it, and a winning scratcher all stuffed in my bra. I'd say it was a pretty successful Thursday night.
I'm so glad you support me having casual sex with your uncle
Like I want to yell at him for pissing on my floor but there's still a chance its my pee....
chasing tequila with frosting. best baby shower ever.
When I walked out of the bathroom and you were literally dancing, you looked at me and said 'this is how I dance'. And then continued.
Randomize
