He asked me to grab his balls and yell "thats a spicy meat-a-ball" Last time I do requests.
He looks like he has a penis
What the fuck
A good one, a good penis
Been home for 3 days and already spiked coffee with Kahlua. Only 106 till we go back to school
I bought you a small gift as a preemptive apology for being a drunken slut tonight.
I'm not a home wrecker but if one more married man with a yacht asks me to go scuba diving I'm NOT saying no
I'm at a nursing home getting weed. Lol when times are tough, things tend to get a lil weird
Okay. I am working on pulling a tooth out of my mouth. Call me.
i'm sad to say... seems like women around here set up their armageddon booty calls ahead of time. wanna fill all these condoms with tequila and head downtown???
I didn't have toilet paper until 20 minutes ago. But I have champagne. Priorities.
I think you should just bang him and get it out of your system.
That's what you say about everyone.
I have a pair of clean panties in my purse. This is having your life together.
I just got fingered in the Win-Co parking lot for pills. How's your meltdown going?
I don't know who he was but he was covered up with a shower curtain and ate a whole bottle of tums
I remember that. We went to taco bell looking for pizza.
I mean that was the nicest way to be dumped by some one I wasn't dating.
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