Remember that sex scene from American Psycho?
Ya, why?
We should try that some time.
Tiger Woods should have just walked in, gave everyone a high five, and left.
He had Jail Releases phone number programed into speed dial on his phone.
After I saw you grinding on that guy with your shirt completely unbuttoned, I figured it was time for pizza.
Kill yourself wednesday started off with a bang, and im pretty sure im still drunk from tequila tuesday.
So I love how we keep introducing our friends to sex toys. It's like pay it forward vibrator edition.
You're mold. I may or maynot have puked blood this morning.
Just had Jager bombs for breakfast with her roommate... I do not regret this newfound lesbianism.
I may not have eyeballs after all the drunk naked people having sex outside.
I will pee on everything he values.
Can I just say I love that you have a kegorator on your wedding registry?
Okay so for future reference and your own safety I should probably tell you that it is not cranberry juice in that bottle on the kitchen table.
Welp, dad and I drunkenly sang Christmas carols until the police told us to stop. I vote Xmas eve a success
My logic for bringing him home was, he's in law school so odds are he wouldn't kill me.
the day i stop sending you hentai screenshots is the day i actually act like an adult, and TRUST ME. THAT AINT HAPPENING ANYTIME SOON.
Randomize