Black lace...the rest is up to ur imagination
whoever gets the blood i just donated is getting a shit ton of free thc
I woke up this morning with my shirt on upside down.
You mean inside out.
No, upside down. I ripped the neck hole in the process of getting it around my waist.
Getting up at 8 this morning to drink could be the best and the worst idea we've ever had
she sounds like chewbacca in bed
I wish we never smoked. I'm literally laying in bed opening and closing my eyes, just hoping a hot dog stand will appear in the room.
So I woke up in a strange bed with a note taped to my arm giving me directions back to my brothers apartment.
It's like an R Kelly music video in here. Only a matter of time before someone pisses on someone
Are you drunk? Because I am and if you're not, this may be very awkward in the morning
Thats for me to know and you to find out.
You better be Eskimo Brother-ing the FUCK out of tonight right now. Long distance 'balls deep' high five
We got the DJ into it too! "If there are any dudes into other dudes out there, my man mark is looking to get pounded. Buy him a drink stat!"
I sent "Rawrrrr" to 151 matches on Tinder. I feel like thats a substantial size of the DC female population.
I'm not gonna swipe right, he has better hair than me. Just no.
They offered me pot brownies in 7 minutes flat. Imagine my horror when I had to be like, are those gluten free?
I just chased my birth control with Smirnoff. Shit's about to go down.
Randomize
