I'm already going to be stripping so like pretty much you would just be watching me. Also we're watching twilight. again.
I just realized that "Hey girl, when you gonna let me tap that?" is in iambic pentameter. I'm going to write a poem...
i've never heard her scream louder than when the koreans scored. what am i lacking in bed?
Nah you can have him. There's too many men in my life right now. I can't handle another dick.
Worst PDA I've ever seen. She even licked the mustard off his mustach
Thank GOD those kids were having a lemonade stand, I didn't have anything to wash down my plan b with.
found a rock and smashed the sliding glass door. home safe. screen door is locked so we're good.
There is a full size piano in the middle of our road. Please tell me you had nothing to do with this.
BAHHAHHAHHAHAHHA SOME ASS IS BIYING NE DRHBKS. DRUBK
don't tell me about being eco-friendly. i just threw up in the same bag i bought my liquor in. RECYCLING
Sometimes I have to make sure these messages are going to you and I'm not about to give someone in my phone book a heart attack.
Yeah, the email that I was sending to get an Escort for the weekend, copied and pasted to my boss, that should be interesting conversation, when I come back from Christmas vacation break.
She was topless, yelling this is Sparta, threatening to push her dad into the sewer. I am pretty sure she won't be at school.
I feel like your boyfriend deserves to know that you're a lesbian.
I mean there are real risks associated with having unprotected sex, but I don’t think I need to worry about a ghost possessing me and having unprotected sex while using my body
Randomize
