so that girl updated her facebook status as "had the worst night ever last night"
um, i could be wrong but i think it might've had something to do with mark drunkenly screaming about her unibrow right in front of her
Some broad at the bar just asked me how much money I make. I don't know whats worse, the question or the answer.
i threw up in over 4 different places last night. it was like a world tour
Went to use to bathroom and walked in on karaoke. Two girls singing "a whole new world" to each other in the shower. I'm gonna miss this place in the summer
The online application for Mcdonald's said I could do incredible things there. Today I threw out shit filled underwear in the women's restroom and escorted a very drunk/high 42 year old man outside after he ordered a 5 dollar foot long and a bloody mary.
he was playing drums on rock band as i poured bailey's into his mouth. tell me that's not a bonding moment.
He yelled "juice on the loose", yes i am sure i need plan b
It's like god made him fantastic at oral to make up for what his mouth does the rest of the time.
I'd rather be sodomized with a fullly decorated Christmas tree.
We're too hungover to prance.
Idk... he wears anklets.. i dont think i can get past that.
If he thinks I'm canceling my orgy to coddle his stupid fucking behavior, he has another thing coming
IF THE SUNS NOT EVEN OUT THEN WHY IS HIS DICK OUT WTF
It's very finicky. Like baking. or BDSM.
you'll kiss me after i give you a blowjob but you wont kiss me after I eat apple sauce? am I the only one who sees something wrong with this?
Randomize
