My room smells like vodka and shame
I am at the point in my high where i now know/understand chinese.
dude just tell them you don't wear clothes. they'll understand
My phone now changes "me" to "mrrrrrrrrh", thank you new years.
Even if he doesn't call, at least I can say i fucked a mascot.
Weird. Haha. I guess taking advice from batman is a good idea.
woke up with food on the counter from chipotle, taco bell, green cactus, and on the border take out. explain?
you were trying to get this Spanish chick to sleep with you. you were showing her how much you "loved her native food."
So I used the "I've never cummed from a BJ before" line last night.
And that worked?
9 for 9! Not only does it give them a goal but they have a sense of accomplishment afterwards.
he ruins everything I try to do including his roommates
There is a mosh pit in our kitchen. You better hurry.
Getting high magically turns headaches into rainbows.
Your dick is going to fall off. Be careful or you'll get callouses. A workingman's dick.
I'm sitting here listening to fat joe and doing kegels I have given up
So, just how hungover are you?
Not at all, surprisingly.
That has to be your X-Men power.
My brain is like a TV with 10 channels, 9 of them are static and the other one just plays that one Nagito Komaeda edit on loop 24/7
Randomize