i was puking in the toilet, he walked in and to talk to me and started puking in the sink.. Could this be my perfect man??
you dont have to exercise, you threw up last night!
Sorry about all the noise last night. We were trying to break bottles by kicking soccer balls at them. If it's any consolation, there's shattered glass and blood all over my kitchen.
I had the spins so badly it was like I was having sex with 2 girls
I am currently google image searching dick piercings, trying to see what I'm getting myself into.
Just took 11th shot of tequila. I may puke in my bear head.
All I remember is that the bartender wouldn't give me scissors cuz I was too drunk
I'm sick of being the only unemployed member of the group. Doing things alone isn't partying. Its sad.
Weekend plan is a big bag of dope, delivery food, Bollywood marathon and masterbating my dick raw.
Masturbated before I came into work and now the finger scanner won't clock me in. Fuck Valentines Day.
On another note I never thought having a drug addicted stalker would prove useful
are you drinking tonight?
I have an exam tomorrow
so yes.
She said she didn't care that I was gay and wants to ride the fucking rainbow
I definitely almost just pulled a condom out of my purse instead of money for my dad.
I refuse to shit my pants for anyone except Cher and Christina Aguilera!
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