Do you feel that fire radiating from matt's crotch for you
Gross. gingers suck
Erica just called me. She woke up in a storage closet in Mike's building with one shoe and no bag. Can you check your photos from last night to see if she had it at the bar?
Half Baked? Au contraire, Ben and Jerry, I was fully baked when I ate that whole pint of ice cream.
foreplay: 7 minutes. sex: 3 minutes. cuddling: 10 minutes. getting dressed: 5 minutes. commute: 5 minutes.
Having an 'SDSU Mom' sticker is just like say 'Hi, my daughter has an std"
I wish we had a justin bieber to wanna fuck when we were younger... But noooo we just had hanson
She has her iPod in her ears slippers and sweats on and is walking around the house up and down the stairs getting "exercise" she just stopped for a water break
I researched the whole pregnancy breast feeding with piercings. I think you dont have to worry about the trifecta milk spraying thing.
He held me the entire night. Not endearing kind of way. Like kidnapping or held hostage kind of way.
I wonder if that one guy remembers you sticking salami to his forehead when he was passed out on new years eve.
Hey.. Here's a thought for the evening. There's only two more sleeps until I fuck you so hard my back teeth will convulse.. Here's too Tuesday! Woohooooo
Why are you awake at 6am and liking photos from rando Russian chicks on Instagram?
just walked across campus with a bottle of champagne in between my boobs. night two and the quest for classiness is already over
are you just sitting in your hotel room drinking popsicle vodka?
.....well anything sounds bad when you say it like THAT
Its like Gods punishment for wanting to party
Randomize
