hell yes lets make some ravioli
I never Thought the day id see a chick shove a 2liter up her vag. that happened last night
Just tried my new showerhead. Sex with Brian will never be the same.
And when we woke up we made beer pancakes. Great start to a family picture day.
i just feel like it would be irresponsible for you to not have sex with me again.
My vagina agrees.
just put an icicle in the bong. best/worst idea ever. i think i can taste global warming right now.
I'm okay. We got a prayer rug sent to us with the face of jesus on it. From Tulsa Oklahoma. Kinda weird.
I don't hate him I just hate being present to see him consume 80 dollars worth of alcohol and then try to tip people with left over money on a Walmart gift card
I think I maybe realized he was too old for me when I went into his bathroom and he had anti aging face cream.
Would it be crossing a line if I told him that I now know his girlfriend has a huge mole on her left ass cheek?
Serious concern: will TSA confiscate my bondage rope?
Sooo a reasonable response to someone eating my lunch is to set the place on fire right?
Stay positive! You think people like sad vaginas? NO! You'll get some!
hey can you come unlock the basement door? I'm trapped in here.
no I can't, you're a safety hazard. but, there's a beer keg down there somewhere. we don't have cups, but help yourself.
Idk but when you think about it the last time I did bottomless mimosas I ended up getting my nipples pierced so it might be fair
Randomize
