Did u get laid? I went and bought lube and fleshlighted it while moaning ur name the whole time.
Yea and his cousin visited from central and i fucked her i was texting him at work teasin him about it but sent it to his mom by accident
i knew he was a douchebag when his facebook activities were "ladeis," and "gettin crunk wit ladeis"
Today in class was pretty awsome. I dont feel like i have to throw up and im actually paying attention. This is a first for friday
yeah they are definitely having sex in that car. joe just yelled through the window telling them to do the "titanic hand print thing"
There was a bottle of vodka and chips in a vase next to the bed
Horrible. I told her my girlfriend is in the hospital and she tried to give me a lapdance.
Trick or treaters just rang our doorbell
Give them the moldy beer cans, we need to get rid of those
nothing like a walk of shame in front of a cnn news crew to start the morning off right
Yesterdays boozy weather forecast has been extended to today
I sleep texted my mom and asked her for a condom last night
Officially conquered sex on my couch with my dad asleep in the next room
I like how you say "conquered" as if that was your sole mission in life
So... In conclusion, do I bring my vibrator and risk not only having it getting taken out at security, but also exposing my dad to my neon green vibrator, or just leave it here?
Woah don't start going all boyfriend on me now, you're here for one thing and one thing only and that's sex, hot shameless sex.
Everythings in imax form. Space oddessys are formed. Adventure at every moment and everything is epic. My mouth hass lemons. Yum.
Randomize
