Kay wants to put chicklets in our cooters to make beavers and take pix captioned Got Wood? Taking public transit does scary things to her.
And people are going to start dressing like that in public, it's just ridiculous, the goths and now the GAGAs
I just watered my plants with apple juice. Look what you made me do.
Oh my god. I think I just sexted my mom...
What?!
Fwd: Ride me, you sleek sleek woman!!!
hr gave me pretxwk salad and a doubke shot of grey goose. i approve! tou guys are a beautidil couple.
Drinking gin at a party, riding a giant inflatable walrus all around the living room.
He was trying to hotbox the banana suit. Of course we traded him for vodka.
This coke is making my nose hairs dance. That good.
Until they make a bed that bathes you in your sleep, I will not be satisfied.
I should probably stop opening conversations with 'guess who's horny'.
I thought i didnt really feel whatever i snorted last night until i just realized i think i asked this dude to punch me fight club style
ugh I gave him morning sex and he doesn't even text me back for my bagel order
The sex definitely would have been a perk. But not sitting in a ditch was what I was going for...
Well... Chad blew off half of his hand last night. We were able to find most of it.
Fuck the system, do you have any medieval weapons?
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