i mean i cnt help that this campus has the highest STI rate
I feel like i got beat with a pillowcase full of tequila shots.
I puked in the revolving door and had to sit down on the escalator. That hungover. It's safe to say people are judging me.
They woke me up at 6am and made me drink a bottle pf champagne yelling "champagne breakfast!"
I action rolled over a firepit. Twice. I am the action roll king
at one point i was feeding a guy sour cream chips and he made me make the "choo choo" noise as they were going in. \ni feel so much closer to him now.\n
The night started going downhill when I set my foot on fire.
I just learned a new drink. Sloppy Ninja. Half Saki Half Nyquil
COME GET ME FR THE HOSPIGAL'!!!!!
That amazing moment when the girl in the passenger seat decides to strip you while your driving.
He's hitting it raw. Might as well stick his dick in a vat of SARS at this point.
This popcorn tastes like salt and regret. It reminds me of the first blowjob I ever gave.
You've ruined popcorn for me.
2014 decided to stick it to me one last time. Right up the ass.
I am far too sober to understand you right now. sorry.
she passed out standing next to the car. her head hit the door so hard the alarm went off. she instantly snapped out of it and started sprinting away
Randomize
