Bro can a girl get pregnant if i jizz in her mouth?
hahahahahahahahahahaha
she must wash her vagina with a dirtier vagina
not sure what i find more disconcerting, your text or the fact that i recognized that as a dane cook quote
$3 wine plus diet sprite does not make good champagne.
does taste better than andre tho
Omg. It looks like a crack pipe exploded in your mouth.
Apparently shes in the bathroom puking but eating a pot roast she found in the fridge at the same time.
I wish I was in the big bed with a naked you post sex eating chicken nuggets
Just watched my roommate stuff a sandwich in his pocket because we're out of paper plates.
I just told him he had gained a new brother. He immediately knew I meant the eskimo kind.
MY MOM IS GOING TO SMOKE WITH ME.
SHE'S GOING TO SMOKE HIGH QUALITY MARIJUANA WITH ME.
Still trying to figure out where I was when someone broke the lawn chair and put it in the bathroom.
10/10 dentists agree that he is one bangable mother fucker. hint: i am all of these dentists.
I'm sorry I pissed in your bedroom and then woke you up when I tried to jump off the balcony
He gave me a box of cheez-its after sex, does that make me a hooker?
Let's just say I peed the bed last night, and I wasn't in it alone. Whoooops
Got so drunk I broke my sink in half. Not. Lying.
Randomize
