that's an acceptable place to lick
i wish my penis had a tongue
I learned to sign I want to be on you today
Score
Deaf chicks here I come
i blame lastnights decisions on friday the 13th
What. The. Fuck. No, you will not spank me.
That wasn't intended for you, my bad.
Registered for next semester classes drunk. Let's hope I didn't accidently sign up for history of dinosaurs again...
You handed some guy a spoon you found, he yelled SPOON GAME, and then the two of you spent the next 20 minutes throwing spoons all over the kitchen.
I'm sober in pajamas at a bar. Nothing is ok about that statement.
We were playing hot potato with real potatoes at 3am
You went into the shower with my roommate and cursed him out asking why he was there
We'll just charge in there, all pant less and fabulous demanding he give back her ferret.
By the power invested in me i promise you hot wedding sex at my wedding.
MIDGETS
????
The best thing about last night is when drunk Lauren asked cop if she could smoke a joint in front of him. And next thing I remember she’s smoking weed with a cop. How awesome is that.
we cut you off when you started chasing with your slim fast shake
Randomize
