I wish i could go to google and type in drug dealers and it would bring up a number, a product and direction
so I woke up and found tortilla in my belly button
He puked at the bar then immediately procceded to slip in it, they loaded him up into a wheelchair, then the staff and myself walked him outside, all the while never having to pay for our tab. SO using this strategy again
well at that point we were just fucking to keep warm.
in light of our recent drunken behavior, i think it's time we seriously consider hiring ourselves a babysitter.
In my drunkeness I was planning how to throw up without my parents hearing. I was gonna go for a "run" and just throw up outside.
This is Jewish guilt versus Irish Catholic guilt. We should tread carefully, or we could fuck up the space-time continuum or something.
I'm okay with that.
Signs you do Molly too much. Glow sticks fallout of random articles of clothing on academic row
I've finally given up enough on finals week to wear the same shirt three days in a row, because I didn't take my hoodie off for the first two.
It bothers me when I see my old fuck buddies starting families on Facebook.
My dog misses eating marshmallows out of your butt when you're passed out. That bordered on sex abuse, now that I think about it. My bad.
He was like the most intimidating looking guy you've seen in your life except he was really shittily doing the two step
this isn't the first time drunken padiddle ended in a fist fight..
Checked my bank account this morning...apparently I went to 7-11 at 4am and spent $22 on taquitos. New all time low for me.
I ate all of them. New all time low for ME.
Alcohol and I aren't friends right now.
Randomize