Apparently I think casual Friday means I can show up unshaven in yesterday's clothes and reeking of booze.
Her boobs more than make up for all the flaws with her personality.
it's like i need an invisible sign across my boobs that says "DOESN'T HAVE DADDY ISSUES" that only old men can see
We already established this. No, he did not cum on the dog.
Every once in a while you'd chuckle to yourself, and when I asked you what's so funny u replied "sometimes my toes tickle eachother"
I think they called the cops after 15 minutes of you shaking their clothes line like the ultimate warrior and calling out hulk hogan
Her roommate texted her and told her that her cat died. Now she's double-fisting bottles of wine while howling and wailing her dead cat's name. Not how I pictured this booty call.
Let's just rave with boners that last for hours
hey the jello shots wont freeze
How much Everclear did you put in them?
uhhh all of it
I got punched in the face by a Cowboy last night. Then he bought me a beer cause o convinced security not to kick him out the bar. Start of a fairytale love story? I think so.
Let's play the game let's see how long Kayla can be sober
And he's a cuddle champ. I know because I slept over because I don't know what boundaries are.
I woke up covered in thousand island dressing. I need answers.
A cop may or may not have seen my bare ass against the moonlight within the past hour
Although, she is an extremely cool person. She put the "buddy" in "fuck buddy." And I mean that in the most respectful way possible.
Randomize
