Help. Asians are flirting in front of me(773): They speak asian
your all-time low pick up line was when you asked a girl "Are you rock-staring at me?"
My history with restaurant waiters is severely limiting our dinner options.
Ohmy god im about to fuxk my TA. i thyought this was a dream but i love you. <3
After we fucked he shhhh'd me and said your welcome
Cops do not care. One just laughed and said "precious"
I'm playing a little game called "how many shots of jack can I take before I become a shit show tonight". All front row seats are sold out.
Can we just talk about how awesome I am. I just slept with a new guy while listening to the previous guys bands cd.
sometimes a perk of being a drug dealer is amazon gift cards. who knew?
It has now been 10 days since we last saw Sebastians penis
I'm at a sex party and there's a guy in an ICP jersey and trip pants. I see now that this is the moment in the movie of my life I recognize I have a problem
I can't come. It's so cold my uterine walls have frozen together like a cherry popsicle.
I'm disappointed in the internet. It's two days and there's still no fanfiction based off that Manning/Beckham commercial.
You don't even like football
I am playing in the snow in my bunny outfit. GET OVER HERE
My husband found the cock ring I bought my FWB. I told him it was napkin holder and he believed me. And that’s why I need a side dick
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