please dont tell anyone i was drunk
you were publicly making out with a very old very spandex covered woman...they know
I was so drunk that I didn't realize he was staying at the Waldorf. I walk of shamed the Astoria, do you even know what this means?
i dont care how hungover you are, go back to the frat house and get him. HE IS 11.
I don't think he knows what shame means anymore. He gave some bar slut his sisters Tiffanys necklace, in exchange for anal.
Too bad they don't have an emoji symbol for condoms and 99 cent tacos
I'm eating crumbled blue cheese out of Tubbaware. My life is nothing.
I understand why they say don't drink the water in Mexico... I just saw 5 guys piss upstream of where the bar tender went to get the water
I woke up at 5:47 in the morning to you peeing on my parents bedroom floor. I think we've established that you have a limit .
Too much alcohol and too many lesbians. I can officially say I have regrets now. At least that's something.
The dorm having an ice machine is their way of inviting us to make mixed drinks.
And that is why we dont do tequila shooters at 1 in the afternoon. Because you go home with a beast like that
My date ended with her leaving the bar with that guy who used to jerk off in the back of the school bus.
I didn't even get crazy off of the coke so everything's fine. Also, I think I might have killed my aunt's dog..
She climbed in my window blew me and left. She's in my phone as the blow job fairy
I have bruises everywhere an I broke the lamp. So ya I'd considerate rough sex.
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