I wanna bring you to show and tell
So when does "going out for one drink" = giving some guy an HJ on the sidewalk?!?
I knew the sex would be bad when he slipped the rubber on and said "safe sex activated"
how many times in life can you be kicked out of a pizza buffet for vomiting on the food and insulting small children
I have absolutely nothing sober to say to you.
I just put up a picture on my dorm room wall of that ginger you hooked up with to remind myself that everyone makes mistakes
You love him. Dinosaurs. Math. Sex.
omg dinner turned into a foam party this is weiriiid
Cute underage boy is in my house.
OH MY GOD. DON'T DO ANYTHING. WHY IS HE IN YOUR HOUSE.
Actually let's just focus our energy on not getting committed to a psych ward.
STONER SAFETY TIP: don't use the driver's side vanity mirror to check how red your eyes are while you're driving. it won't work. trust me.
Well I'll be shitfaced all day the 4th in honor of this great nation... but I'm down for drunken camping/nature fucking on the 5th
there's a 50/50 chance the night will end in alcohol-induced rituals of satanic nature
Dude i woke up today by a pile of fried chicken and wearing a bra
.......stop going to frat parties....
IT WAS A FUCKING ELEPHANT I SWESR!!!!!
Nathan, I haven't spoken to you in 12 years and it's 6am. Kindly fuck off.
Randomize
