I think I left something in your back seat.... It was my integrity
I haven't been this sober since birth.
Please explain to me what this has to do with my fantasy to fuck larry king?
so when am I gonna get some from you?
when you dick grows 3 inches
adderall flavored popcorn. yes we did it and its awesome
You brought out the iron board layed it on the ground in the middle of everyone and passed out for the night
Should I give the penis ring toss game to good will or garbage
i think my love is proven by the fact that i still want to have sex with you after this conversation
Looks like breakfast in bed is out the window. She can't get up because I "fucked her into paralysis." My stomach is not happy with my dick right now
Why were you staring at her like that over breakfast?
Because I was eating with a spoon to remind her that she threw up on my hand while she was MAKING me spoon with her after our drunk sex. She got it. Don't worry.
they told me if I wanted to live here I had to get an ass tattoo and then they all mooned me simultaneously. ass tattoos as far as the eye could see.
I've never had goosebumps on my dick before. It was definitely not a bad feeling.
you regret 100% of the tequila shots you do take. thats what gretzky meant to say
My mind's like "He's a sexist pig" but my uterus is like "YOU SHALL BEAR HIM STRONG CHILDREN"
It's OK, I woke up in a drag queen's bed last weekend. It took me forever to get the glitter out of my cleavage.
Randomize
