Hey, It's Lauren. i wanted to talk to you tonight. I like you, as you know because kyle told you. I was wondering if you liked me too?
Are you in the third fucking grade? Check yes or no.
we made out on top of his cat.
You tried to wear your Jesus costume into Family Christian stores and say it was a book signing.
You took shots of captn out of a empty percocet bottle, i just saw you fall threw the floor of rock bottom.
Because of no shave november, it's no boys december... pay back
just looked at his mug shot... not really my type
I will also be strapping forties to the puppies.
I've been buying my puppy dildos for chew toys. I can't wait till a girl comes over and my dog is gnawing on a giant black cock
How do you leave a condom wrapper under my mom's pillow...
This may not be the best moment to laugh, but I am.
Sorry I told all the other bridesmaids you were an asshole. I had had a few drinks and it's how I felt at the time.
This chick walked up to me in the bar and started making out with me, then grabbed my drink while I wasn't looking and walked off.
Hopefully he gets to dig deep into my body, before he digs deep into my past ..
His birthday is on cinco de mayo and he doesn’t drink or like tacos. What a waste.
2020 sucks, I want a refund
27 year olds can still do oral in a car right? Or is that trashy?
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