I haven't seen him in over a year. He asked me to his prom over myspace. Is he fucking serious?
Then you jumped off your bed with your arms outstretched, yelled "I'm Goliath, watch out New York!" and then began singing the Gargoyles theme song as you 'soared' around your room.
Don't be ridiculous, the Gargoyles theme song has no words. How could I sing that mess?
You just started going "da da da da da! da da da da da! DA DA!!" then going "swoosh" as you glided about.
I just saw that your im name has '4eva' in it. Your man card has been revoked.
Apparently the guard had to repeat "you're too drunk to get in" three times before I understood. I guess he was right.
10 dollar pizza all the toppings you want. Wait Until You See This Pizza
We went into lab today and when no one was looking i touched our cadaver's penis!
FUCK YOU CALIFORNIA. YOU DO NOTHING RIGHT. FIRST PROP 8 AND NOW THIS.
She just threw the soap bottle at me from the ladie's room and keeps asking me when we left the bar and got on the boat.
Wanna skype?
Can your lips gently and pleasantly suck on my balls via skype? If not, then no.
One my way home. There was too much fog, strobe lights, and cocaine for my taste.
I command you to take a shot and dance like the pretty little gay boy you are.
hot boxing the bathroom at chili's. where the fuck are you, it's too big of a box for just one person.
My chiropractor just high fived me for getting drunk enough to throw my back out this weekend.. Life. Complete.
I'm gonna write a book. Almost Awesome: all the times I ALMOST got laid.
You know it's a good May 2-4 when it involves 14 straight hours of vodka slush and garlic bread
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