try this...when you orgasm scream his address including city state and zip...
I don't think the people up for their 8am class were as impressed with how many beads i got last night as we were.
the amount of times i have wished for a boxed wine emoticon is almost alarming. almosttt
This dude was wearing a "Plan B- One Step" backpack. I wonder how many more I have to buy until I get mine??
He's tryingto open a beer with a Police baton. Cut him off or see where this leads?
I have fireworks and redbull; let's make heart attack inducing magic happen.
I just had the weirdest moment. Made eye contact at the bar with a girl who has seen my vagina.
Lets watch game of thrones and have sex every time someone is naked. It'll be like a drinking game but better.
Just had a guy try to pull the maraca out of my shirt with his teeth... Wtf
you just missed a great speech in which i almost coined the term "ass-ian" as in "my vaginal and ass-ian regions are no longer safe"
God please dont post that to facebook.
this place is dumb. no one understands my Sunday morning alcoholism here.
The housekeeper found my huge dildo under the bathroom sink, and another in the living room. I can't get much more single than this.
Explain to me again why I'm doing the walk of shame if we fucked at my house?
I'm like a great zombie Jesus.
Xanax, wine, and giving the neighbor blue balls. How about you?
Jesus, it’s Tuesday morning! Not back stage with Motley Crew
Randomize
