Potential corruption. He's 19.
Get them while they're young!
So I just had this crazy idea, and no it has nothing to do with the fact that they made me take shots at work.
Tampa is so boring. I'm dying. I want lots of cleavage at my funeral. If i cant get laid, i want my friends to. I'm that kind of person
This girl told me I had the balls of an infant..I replied by saying her vagina looks like Stargate.
Well fuck that. I mean, I made out with my cousin once. Who gives a fuck.
I've heard so many rumors about me being taken home in an ambulance I'm starting to believe them.
I don't care how old I am, if it's your 21st birthday I'm going to make out with you.
Just finished putting caution tape around the tv. Sober me needs to prepare.
Apparently you can coat check a keg.
All three of us got laid last night. This is what is commonly referred to as the Trifuckta.
I just want a boyfriend who will have sex to Disney Pandora.
I hope so much that you got average or above average dick tonight because I wish you the best
I walked out ot my car in the morning thinking there was a sandwich I left there from yesterday. Then later that day I was checking the mail and saw the other side of my car :/
It concerns me the most that u were potentially going to eat a day old car sandwich.
He drove over an hour to get this shit done. I guess i win the golden vagina award tonight
Put on my pants to go to work and discovered they had melted.
Randomize
