its like his balls were made of silver and he was trying to polish the tarnish off
If your 8 lb baby was ham it would serve 6-8 people
just spent all of my last class as a college student, vomiting in the bathroom. its moments like these i will cherish
Apparently the library doesn't care about celebrating the day Jesus became a zombie.
He went down on me in his escalade and his dick is bigger than my forearm. I'm never going back to white guys.
Your dad needs a mid life crisis affair thing, I could totally be that girl.
Just climbed to the top of a frozen waterfall! Do you want to do drugs tm night? The two are unrelated.
He met a random girl on the bus home and decided to go to Spain with her. The blackout decisions are becoming internationally epic. He has work in the morning.
I'll even be awesome and bring pizza for your family, just as a "hey thanks for letting a stranger get trashed at your house" gesture.
Her vagina was like a painting you can put your face in.
Of the three people getting wasted at this dance competition, im two of them
What the hell do you have that is more important than a GIANT WATER SLIDE?
My actions are not mine. They are the actions of Patron.
Well, we 69'd in the Jacuzzi. If that tells you the kind of night I had. Neither of us knew we could hold our breath that long. Deff. Most. Dangerous. Sex. Ever.
Are we allowed to ho on the roof?
Randomize
