I know it's VERY late and i know i may have burdened you, but on the chance that it's sat nite- are you up or willing to be? Christinas camping and i'm chillin alone.
Someone's got a whale tail
A thong is hangin out?
No, a fatty following them
omg i finished an entire carton of double double chunk chunk ice cream last night...
what? what exactly is in double double chunk chunk?
self-loathing.
he poured tabasco sauce in my vag.. I'm still having a hard time going to the bathroom.
I'm making progress with her.. She actually looked at me today and gave me a dirty look. Things are going real good.
There's a lady carrying her kids toy animals in a crown royal bag. Mom of the year.
I can't be drunk. Sober yes. Drunk no. Spoonfuls
You mailed him a break up letter, because you thought the "joy of receiving a letter" would ease the pain of you dumping him.
How soon is too soon to enter the slutty phase of this breakup?
I just put my hair into this ponytail & it looks hideous & really cool at the same time. I am dedicating it to the hangover I have
I knew as soon as he opened a beer with his teeth to shotgun it that I was going to sleep with him. I'm never going home.
So I had a crappy evening so the fat girl in me says eat and cry and watch something sad. The cool girl in me says don't eat go run. So I'm watching family guy and doing crunches w a pickle in my mouth
Gross
AN ACTUAL PICKLE
I've officially done it all, fucked a girl wearing a twister board. ABC parties are amazing!
Dude just bought the table 3 bottles of champaign and broke one on the floor as his "signature" and he makes me want this recession hit harder
Look,the guy had sex w/a Canadian prison guard on the deck of a cruise ship,he could blow any second.
Randomize
