Kenny Powers is just a normal guy with exceptional hair
arkansas has a gas station called kum and go....story of my life
Turns out you're obligated under man law to share any passwords you may have for porno sites
Is that what they're teaching u at that bar review class?
I could feel myself puking on my feet but it was so warm i didnt even care.
I heard you were walking home with taylor with your dress completely up and your ass exposed
Yeah, that sounds like my life.
I have a theory he's part Neanderthal
Update- I sold my hat to some drunk kid for 50 bucks. I used my earnings to buy beer on the way home. I realize to everyone else seeing me drinking on my balcony at 6am, I look like an alcoholic, but I'm thinking of it as a night cap
You don't want any of I have. Seriously. Its 80 proof rum that was 8 bucks for a liter. I'm afraid
I'm sure your liver is writing out a will as we speak
I mean I sucked his dick at 3 AM... UNDERWATER. I think I have earned a follow back on twitter.
I deflowered you on valentines day. I AM THE BEST AT ROMANCE. LOVE ME.
Yeah bunch of crazy shit... Makes you wonder how anyone found someone before tinder
I just look at my butt and see so much potential.
while giving me head, she stopped, looked up at me smiling and said "ill never be able to look at bananas the same way again" and then went back to work.
The fact that u had sex with a Disney prince blows my mind, you're my hero.
I'm like a camel in the desert in a black hole I'm so thirsty.
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