it sucked. he totally couldn't get it up. blamed it on never having cheated b4. Couldn't stop laughing. fuck.
That girl would be great looking if she lost 1000 pounds and cut off her head.
we usually just have an Easter beer hunt and never end up at church anyways
Don't remember shit. It was only until I saw the glaze on my forearm that I knew you drove to get donuts last night. I also spent 20$ there apparently
Sorry for locking you out after accusing you of eating my Skittles... I realized I was mistaken after just throwing up the rainbow.
Sorry I kept grabbing your vagina at the casino. I believed it was my lucky unicorn to win bonuses
Thank god for makeup because it looks like someone took a shit on my face
I'm gonna fuck that sweet little pussy of yours into absolute submission
Wow. Sorry. As soon as I sent that I felt inappropriate. But yes. Bring a sandwich after. Lol
Is it wrong I want to seduce my ex to prove the point to his current gf he's an ass?
My therapist keeps stopping to ask what 'hooking up' means
ITS ORAL SEX CAROL
Then, she put flavored warming oil on my dick and was amazed when something she bought FROM SPENCER'S almost burned my dick off.
Okay so how much boob would you consider inappropriate for smart casual?
I just made my mom buy me lube. I've reached a new level of broke.
who knew being a fake dominatrix could be so fun?
There were no words. I got in his car, took my pants off, threw my shirt out the window, and got things started. After we were done I collected my clothes, gave him a kiss, and crept back into my house.
You're like the sex ninja. How doesn't he love you?!
Randomize
